We live in an instant society. We can get our movies on demand, pay our bills online, and there is an app for everything. We have lost our ability to wait. And the waiting is the hardest when it is for something that we want more than anything – like a baby.
I get it. The hardest thing for me to do in life is wait. And when you are trying to conceive, life can seem like it is full of waiting. The waiting for an appointment, for your period, for the results of blood tests, the waiting room, waiting for the doctor, the list is endless. All capped off with the dreaded two week wait.
Waiting can feel like an active process of doing nothing. Sometimes it can feel like it can take all of our conscious effort and it can be exhausting. And yet, there is a part of me that believes that patience is power. That the doing of nothing, the actual process of waiting is not an absence of action; rather it is about perfect timing. It’s about really getting clear on the right time to act, for the right reasons and in a right thinking way. Infertility is an incredible spiritual journey of exploring your relationship to patience, waiting and uncertainty. It can be a self-enforced time of doing nothing. And for me it is like fire burning me to the ground. It consumes me and leaves room for nothing else. There is nothing left to do but be fully in it.
Burning with you.
|Pamela Madsen was the first Executive Director of RESOLVE NYC and is the Founder of The American Fertility Association. Pamela is an internationally known fertility advocate who has appeared on Oprah and countless other major media outlets. Currently, Pamela is a fertility coach and publisher of The Fertility Advocate. She is also a blogger for Psychology Today and SpermCheck Fertility.|